Yesterday, March 21, my wife and I celebrated our 35th wedding anniversary. That same day I talked with a dear Christian friend whose marriage ended in divorce. I know this is not what she wanted, but the tragedy and hurt still remains a fact. I am convinced that so many times marriages are destroyed because one partner feels that their vows are not as important as their pleasures. The Scripture speaks in 2 Timothy 3:1-5 of the last days and says among other things men shall be “truce breakers” and “traitors”. This section starts by saying, “men shall be lovers of their own selves” and ends with “lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God”. Surely this is where we are at today. The vows most men and women make today are only vows of convenience. Once its no longer convenient, once they begin to interfere with their pleasures, then they are simply discarded.
The Psalmist in Psalm 15:1 asks; “Who shall abide in thy tabernacle? Who shall dwell in thy holy hill?” One answer he gives is found in verse 4, “he that sweareth to his own hurt and changeth not”. Sometimes marriage is not convenient; sometimes age, disease, accidents, etc. change people. They may no longer have the physical beauty or be able to please us physically as they once did; but remember that marriage is a vow made to another, ” before God and these witnesses” and that vow is to be honored despite the inconvenience of doing so.
Men, let me especially speak to you for a moment. You vowed to keep yourself wholly to your wife. This includes your mind and eyes. Let me say to you, that it is just as wrong to look as it is to touch! Please do not try to play games with your spouse or God, both know what you vowed and both have a right to expect you to honor that vow.
Let us be as the young oriental pastor being questioned at his ordination about whether he would surrender his papers if he did something that dishonored his Lord. He replied simply that he would not do such a thing. The counsel reminded him that they knew that he did not plan to do so, but if he did, would he surrender his papers. The young man replied that he perfectly understood their question, but they must understand that his heart was fixed on his Lord and that he would guard it with all his strength and therefore, would entertain no thought that he would in any way dishonor his Lord. May we take the same attitude toward our marriage and purpose in our heart that our vows are not a matter of convenience but to be kept at all cost till death do us part.